shaken

Nov. 6th, 2011 03:14 am
easilyflustered: (taken aback)
[personal profile] easilyflustered
Following the encounter with Shelly, Liam is shaken. He wants nothing more than to get back to his room and hide and just... be alone.

Unfortunately, he discovers that he forgot, in his nervousness about going out into the town, something important.

His key.

He doesn't dare kick in his door, though he knows he is capable of it. He doesn't want a broken doorjam and a door that won't lock and offer him some form of protection.

He considers and rejects going to the child version of himself to be let in. After the encounter he's had, he's too shaken and will likely frighten the child accidentally.

After standing in the hallway, feeling exposed and vulnerable, for several minutes, he remembers that one Break can pick locks. He'd heard that Break was injured by Shelly, but hopefully he's recovered enough for that.

He meanders down the hallways to his room, jumping at shadows just a bit, and hesitates for a moment before knocking on the door.

[Private to [livejournal.com profile] almost_knightly and [livejournal.com profile] clear_as_bells]

Date: 2011-11-12 06:43 pm (UTC)
clear_as_day: (Pardon?)
From: [personal profile] clear_as_day
There's a pause, a thump against the door, and an orange paw fishing around underneath it. Liam might remember this sight from when the Break in question was a cockatoo. The cat is bigger now, but they haven't managed to wean her away from this violently joyous method of greeting their guests.

Muttering is heard from within; the cat is removed, and a few moments later, Liam answers the door. He has to stare for a moment before he realizes which one it is -- he's not as quick as Xerxes at identifying the various doubles around the mansion. But the gropey one, he decides, would probably not make such a face in public if he could help it.

"Ah, hello," he says mildly. "It's good to see you up."

He means it.

1/2

Date: 2011-11-13 06:26 am (UTC)
clear_as_day: (Yes dear.)
From: [personal profile] clear_as_day
Perhaps it's because they're doubles; perhaps it's just because he's accustomed to watching for this sort of thing these days. Regardless of the reason, Liam notices the other man having trouble immediately. It's entirely understandable, he thinks; reasonable, even.

Liam elects to be kinder than usual, and hide it under normalcy.

"Ah. You want the menace to society." He turns over his shoulder, a little slower than he generally might. "Xerxes?"

2/2

Date: 2011-11-13 06:32 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (Eeeeew it's Vincent Nightraaaaay)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"I've been behaving," Break calls from somewhere within the room, having heard the whole thing. "That cat is more a menace than I am right now. Shove off."

Liam disappears into the bedroom, presumably to help Break get to his feet. He leaves the door wide open, though, to avoid any more surprises if possible.

The orange cat paw is now fishing around under the bathroom door.

Date: 2011-11-13 06:56 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (Yes WELL.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"I'm coming, I'm coming. Stop hovering, you."

There's a rustling, and an odd clicking, and then Break appears -- on crutches. He looks exhausted, but it's less a look of being tired and more a feel of it; something in his expression is weary in a way that goes deeper than just a lack of sleep. He hasn't bothered to change out of his pajama pants today and there's a brace around one knee, intended to prevent his leg from moving too much.

"Stand back," he says to Liam as he approaches the door. His own Liam follows, but holds back, letting him go on his own.

1/2

Date: 2011-11-13 08:09 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (:P)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"Nope."

The word is short and clipped and it's obvious he doesn't want to talk about it. For now, though, it doesn't seem to be slowing him down all that much. Once he's maneuvered his way out of the door, he takes off down the hall at a normal pace -- which, sadly, is probably an indication that he's had to use crutches before in his past misadventures. This likely doesn't come as a surprise.

2/2

Date: 2011-11-13 08:12 am (UTC)
clear_as_day: (I'm sorry you're dumb)
From: [personal profile] clear_as_day
"Probably not," Liam says, sadly and far softer, moving to stand in the doorway and watch his partner go. "It's the back of his knee -- it would be a difficult injury to recover from fully even if we were at home."

There's more to it, of course, but Liam stops there, giving the other man a polite nod. His counterpart looks like he just wants to be left alone right now, so Liam won't keep him.

Date: 2011-11-15 01:42 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (It is how it is.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
Break doesn't bother to try to start up a conversation -- he's glad Liam is alive again because it means the tiny Liam is more at ease, but there's nothing exactly happy he can think to talk with him about just now. He's also feeling defensive, as he usually is these days when he's in the presence of someone who isn't his partner. Xerxes Break has always been a prideful man, and he doesn't want anyone seeing just how much the injury has taken from him. Not now that he's out of bed and moving on his own.

So he just goes, standing tall even if he is supported by crutches, pausing only a moment at Liam's old door before he remembers the man moved and continuing on past.

Date: 2011-11-16 05:29 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (A moment of vulnerability.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
He actually stops for a moment at that, stiffening, and that's probably enough of an answer right there. Still, Break glances back at Liam -- he's keeping the other man well away from his blind spot, himself -- not quite meeting the other's gaze.

"Yes," he says, very softly. "It was."

Date: 2011-11-16 02:27 pm (UTC)
almost_knightly: (It is how it is.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"She lives in a townhouse in the city," Break says quietly, continuing on, albeit at a slower pace. "Some of the Chains here are allies of mine. They've been...keeping an eye on her for me. She doesn't leave it much, since."

Date: 2011-11-17 05:25 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (Eeeeew it's Vincent Nightraaaaay)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"Good." It's gruff, almost a bitter grunt. "Perhaps that means she's starting to feel better, herself."

Reaching Liam's door at last, Break rests his crutches carefully against the wall, hand held out towards him until he's sure they won't fall over. The bobby pin is pulled from his ponytail, this time.

Date: 2011-11-17 05:47 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (Yes WELL.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"She stumbled into a spell. That's what did it."

He can't kneel down to get to the lock anymore. He's forced to bend awkwardly at the waist, keeping all of his weight on his one good leg. To Liam, it will look easy, but to Break, it feels just wrong enough to irritate him. He hasn't been able to keep up with his yoga properly, and he can practically feel himself growing more and more out of shape by the day.

"Naturally, she wound up wiv a spell that allowed her to remember eeeev'ry last minute of it. She's in just as bad shape as we are."

Date: 2011-11-17 06:21 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (It is how it is.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
Hearing that tone, Break pauses for a moment, considering.

"It's called Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder," he offers at length. "At least, it is at home. It's a documented psychological reaction to any kind of traumatic event. Some experience the symptoms of it worse than ovvers, but at its base, it's more or less the same. Flashbacks, being easy to scare, nightmares, feelings of detachment and hopelessness..."

The way he rattles all this off, it sounds like he has rather a lot of knowledge on the subject.

Date: 2011-11-17 06:34 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (A moment of vulnerability.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"Depends on the person, and the severity. But it can be worked wiv, and frough, and it can fade over time. You have to find what works best for you, and give yourself time."

Break hesitates, then. He's not accustomed to being open with this Liam; he expects that there's probably always going to be a rift between them. But aren't they essentially allies, now, for having been victims of the same attackers? Isn't the little Liam that Break is so close to somewhere inside this one? Didn't they get on fine during that dream?

After a moment, he admits, "I'm only doing as well as I am because I've been living wiv it in some capacity ever since I arrived at Rainsworth."

Date: 2011-11-17 06:57 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (>.[)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"Yes. Outbursts, or general irritability." Break has never spoken with any of his counterparts about that time of their lives, but they really can't be too far off, and so he's pretty sure he knows exactly what Liam is thinking about, and that actually helps him continue to speak. It's easier to speak clinically about it when he passes it all off onto some imaginary Break that he hasn't met, instead of thinking of it as himself. "Your mind perceives whatever happened to you as a violation. Grief, anger, anxiety; it's all a part of attempting to come to terms wiv it, and the vulnerability involved makes you paranoid. Sometimes you want to lash out."

At last, quietly, the lock clicks open. Break turns the knob and pushes the door open, but not far enough to see what's in the room.

"We're leaving, too. I need the privacy, and I don't -- it's hard to get around in here, these days." He turns over his shoulder. "Did you find a place? I can ask my Liam to keep an eye out for you. He'd be glad to."

Date: 2011-11-17 07:16 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (:P)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"Why do you fink I always want to be in small spaces? Like under tables." Break asks with a bit of a snort. He's lucky his own Liam doesn't even look at him funny when he walks in and finds him camping out in the wardrobe with a blanket on his head anymore. Instead he just gives him candy and talks to him anyway.

Break shifts to get his crutches back under his arms, maneuvering carefully so he can continue to keep his weight off the injured leg without falling.

"Whenever you're ready. He's -- my Liam's really good. You can talk to him. He's the best listener I know." He adds in a murmur, "Even if you don't know how to say fings right."

Date: 2011-11-18 05:51 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (It is how it is.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"Does he have bofe eyes?" Break asks quietly. "All the ones I know do."

Date: 2011-11-18 06:15 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (A moment of vulnerability.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"He likely finks of you as his, then. If you were...one of the first to care for him."

It's been twenty years for this Break, but he still vividly remembers the way he'd latched on to the entire Rainsworth household without even realizing it was happening and dubbed himself the surly protector of it -- not that they had ever really needed it, at home.

He chuckles a bit as he moves away from the door. It's fortunate, really, that Shelly had never tried to make him leave. She might not have been able to get rid of him.

Date: 2011-11-18 06:43 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (Yes WELL.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"He's still very much in knight mode, I shouldn't wonder." Break takes a few steps away, but pauses again, waiting for the conversation to draw to a close before he leaves entirely. "I'm afraid you're likely stuck wiv 'im."

He doesn't add that Kevin may well blame himself for not being there to protect Liam, too, no matter how irrational such a thought is. That's too cruel a thing to say, even if Break wouldn't be the least bit surprised if it were true.

Date: 2011-11-18 07:19 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (It is how it is.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
Of course he wanted to hurt them. Break lost his own eye because he gave in to exactly that impulse, once.

"I've been stopping people, too," he admits. "It's...we'll figger it out. Once we're all more stable."

He has no idea what exactly to do with the gratitude. It's not that he isn't aware of the help he's just provided; just that he doesn't know what to say about it. So he just nods and says, "If we move before you feel like coming out, ask the Hatters, or Knave. They'll know where we are, and they -- know what happened."

Date: 2011-11-19 02:23 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (Yes WELL.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
"The Chains close to me know, but ovver than that I've also kept it quiet."

He doesn't feel any need to let Shelly's name get dragged through the mud over this. In fact, quite the opposite. It had taken him a long time to admit that it was her at all for precisely that reason -- no one should ever think her capable of what she had done.

"I'll tell him. He likes having fings to do."

Date: 2011-11-19 04:39 am (UTC)
almost_knightly: (A moment of vulnerability.)
From: [personal profile] almost_knightly
That would be rude, except that Break understands completely. If anything, he feels a great deal of sympathy for this Liam, as well as anger on his behalf -- he'd been shaky enough when he first arrived, and Break never would have wished for such a thing to set him back so much.

He heads off down the hall quiet and thoughtful, and his Liam is waiting for him in the doorway when he gets there. For a while, once the door is closed, Break just slides himself into his arms and holds him, wordlessly.

All in all, he's lucky, and he knows it.

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